A season of Greetings and Gifts and Santa! =D

Hey blog buddies and readers! Merry merry X'mas to you guys out there who are enjoying the parties and the fun! =D gosh..I'm so full of joy now...hahaha...In fact, I don;t really celebrate X'mas, but the songs, the atmosphere and the greetings had definitely made me indulged in the goodness of the tropical X'mas of ours haha! And since it's such a festive and colourful season, here I am again, with a poem called 'What a season' and of course, this is to be dedicated to all that I've known which are...ok I'm gonna have a list here and since there are just too many, guys, if your name doesn't appear, please, safe back the swearing and cursings coz you know that no matter who you are, those whom I've had conclicts with before, everything went with the wind =D and you must know that everyone out there that I've got to know will always have a space right here in my mind =D

I hear the bells jingle,
Such joyful tingling, laughter in the air

I see the snow falling,
O white snow, how pure and white its flakes

I smell the roasting turkey,
In perfection wih a toast of sparkling heaven.

I taste the sweet smelling candies,
That melt instantly in mouth and to the heart of mine

I feel the warmth in this winter wonderland,
looking at the smiles and faces of the children,
calling out to Santa.

A winter with so much to give,
I wish to be in this crystal ball forever.

(To the people whom I owed my life to)
My dearest Mom and Dad and my baby brother Choon Ming (though you're already 17, you forever be my little bro XD

(To my life-time high school buddies)
Wei Keat, Thiam Sang, Weng Chung, Jian Fung, Harry, Wai Lun, Kheng Hong, Andrew, Tuck Man, Kai Jie

(To my forever cheerful cousins XD)
Sherry, Michelle (yan-yan XD hehehe), Douglas, Dennis, Pei Chi, Di-Di cousin bro xD, Jaylyn, Jayson, and alot more..hahaha

(To my college buddies)
Kit Wai, Kean Liang, Ganesa, Eric, Stephen, Mark, Harry, Jia Hui, Kenneth, Brandon, Bernard, Daniel, Pradiv, Alex, Pang Yean, Chi Kean, Kah Kiat, Aaron

(To the unexpected?! yet beautiful ladies XD)
Stefanie, Clare, Divya, Sue Ann, Michelle, Kartigha, Elisa, Jessica, Eunice, Mei Xin, Denise, Alexis, Elizabeth, Snokee, Jessica, Ann, Devina, Shenam

(To the lecturers endless words of wisdom=D)
Mrs. Shama, Mrs Dharma, Ms. Lim(aww..XD), Mr. Ratna, Ms. Grace, Ms. Melalyn, Ms. Angeline and Ms. Khoo (she's a wondeful administrative staff and soon-to-be-lecturer *I supposed* XD

(To my former School teachers...fantastic people! =D)
Pn. Munirah, Pn. Gan, Mrs. Tay, Mr. Gopal, Mrs. Lee, Mrs. Chen, Pn. Chan, Mrs. Ramani XD, Pn. Katuri, Pn. Wong, Mr. Peraganathan and Pn. Chong =D

To my best friends...you know who you are and last but not least, to the wonderful acquaintances that I met along the way

Michelle Yoong, Elaine, Eunice Lee, Melanie, Joey, Siang Ling, Kit Yoong, Adam, Ken, Amanda, Pearly, WenJo, Alithea, Annora, Pit Wai, Mei Sann, Shaz, Shan Lin, Chin Hean, Johnny, Melvin, Pui Yee, Kah Yee, Cynthia, Ms. Valli, Nick Teo, Alan Teo, Chu-Wen

(From Australia)
Mickell, S.T, Bobby Rodgers, Michael, Chace, Kyle, Robert Wilson, Mr and Mrs. Wilson =D Sarah and Nathan

(From the States)
A Poet Who Loves To Sing Alves =D, Elnathan John, Monique Danser, Fiona Davidson, Hunter, Sarrah, David

(From United Kingdom)
Baden Ronnie(Wolfy XD), Charlotte Hubbert, John Wojja Fink XD, Davidson, Andy, Winston

(From France)
Sophie, Tibaulle, Allora, Lucy, Ann, Francis, Timothy, Pierre

Now this took me about an hour to dig into my memory files in search for the correct names...haha...but anyhow, I just hope you guys will enjoy the poem and most of all, have a fantastic and blissful Christmas! Once again, Merry Christmas and Happy New year! =D and I am going off to a gathering cum party cum chaos cum god know whatever... tonight hahaha! XD

A mind of its own

A mind with its never ending chain of memories, a mind of the unthinkable, a mind of a human being...

(My mind, my life. My life, My mind.)

A mind of world,
A world of mind.

Beaming with rays of life.
Drowning the last breath of life…
Into a cellar of deep, deep, darkness.

A place, where it is a home for fear,
It grows…
It is nurtured…
Standing small is the hardened stone,
Falling steep is the hero within…
The puzzle with countless pieces,
Floating on the sea of confusion,
Losing their ways
Losing their ways…
In the cellar they’re buried,
In the cold air they deceased.
What is left is what was left.
Turning into ashes…

A brand new existence.

A new breath of crisp air…
Sweet smelling scent that clears the mist of confusion.
A wave stronger than emotions
Washed over the shores of my mind,
Overlooking the endless ebony sky
Above the mighty cliff of my soul.
Where destiny of tomorrow came unfolding…
Piece by piece,
The puzzle will fit,
And the warmth will begin to fill that punctured void,
With blooms of passion-colored roses
And a touch of angels’ choir,
Slowly humming the pieces into place.
A garden of ease welcomes the fitted thoughts,
And we,
Welcomes the power of possession.

I am my life,
My life is me.

I speak my mind,
Sometimes, my mind speaks me.


oh..by the way, I had some of my poems posted on www.poemhunter.com. Just type Seow under poet's name and hope you guys will enjoy reading them!

The calling of a Voice, The souls separater~ If tomorrow never comes

Just within a night, a lot were wreckly injured, 10 were spent their last breath under the ill-filled junk, the rest had been cast a gloomy spell that will be bound, perhaps for a life time.

Have you not any mercy? You ought to be dead instead of the spotless souls. Too late for blames, may you live with the darkest dreams for the rest of your life. A bus driver? A soul separater!

(The flower without petals)

Why, dear Lord?
Why…
Haven’t you heard my prayers?
Haven’t you answered them…?

I’m…
I’m…
Breathing my last breath…
Dear Lord…
Real soon…real soon…

Why playing games?
Why the punishment
For a sin that I never longed for?
Why you tear the petals apart?
Those stings,
How hurtful…
Dear Lord…


Please put your imagination to play.

Guys, it's not that I'm as old as your grandparents, nor that I'm as long-winded as your parents, but try to think if your loved ones left you without any last words or unexpectedly...how would you feel? A simple question. How would you feel? No, I have not loose my loved ones, but with regards to the bus crash on Sunday,

How would you feel?

To me, I would feel like the flower without the petals around it.

Put not just your loved ones but your friends and everyone surrounding you in that tiny box of yours. Look at them, and

Tell that someone that you love, just what you're thinking of, if tomorrow never comes.
~ Garth Brooks

Of facing, learning and dealing...

Boy, people can be all kinds...and sometimes, it really gets on your nerves and facing, learning and dealing with these people can really make you go nuts!

I have just completed 2 driving lessons for 5 hours, (still it's merely 4 hours or lesser to be exact) since that instructor actually deducted the time to and from the place of lesson... =_='' and plus the time where he stopped for petrol and his BREAKFAST...(faints...) yeah...breakfast, and I'm not kidding...anyway we'll proceed to the next level.

So, this 'fantastic' instructor of mine was brought to me by my dad since he has got to know him earlier on and the fees was quite reasonable (not until what I mentioned earlier on) and I think he should be an 'okay' guy looking on the fact that he's my dad's friend and I would expect him to be a little more 'friendlier' than usual..but of course, on the fair side, I respected him as an instructor and I wouldn't want him to just 'kiss my ass' and ended up learning nothing. And then, nothing went wrong for the 1st 3 days when he drove me for a 5 hours talk, then six, and finally to the Undang test. That was not just about it. I thought he should be a reasonable man but turned out to be a total jerk. In fact, from the 1st time I met him, I have a sense of uneasiness and qualms that crept deep into my spine. But, I somehow shook it off my mind.

Not until the 1st driving lesson, the thought found its way back to my mind and proved that my 6th sense is right XD muahaha...which I'm just joking out of the fun =D Ok...so he took one whole hour and more to explain the main components of driving in the car itself and while he was blah-ing, I listened...yes, and I listened.

(Just a question, would you expect a new learner who has not been driving before for his whole life to absorb everything in one shot without even starting to drive?)

Furthermore, he also told me that 'ok nvm, when you start to drive later, I'll further explain to you and demonstrate...blah...blah...blah... then I started to drive. And my journey to HELL begun.

As I was driving, (for the 1st time in my LIFE), I made a few mistakes and one thing I have to admit that I am no quick learner and I pick up things quite slow at times, what more when my mind was filled with uncertainties and I was feeling a lil' bit nervous that moment. So I entered the wrong gear a couple of times and I left the clutch too fast while it's still under gear one, and I while I was changing gear, I accidentally stepped on the oil pedal a few times as well, and so...the scolding and yelling started. ON THE 1ST DAY OF MY LESSON PEOPLE!!! At the beginning I was contemplating perhaps I'm just too dumb to learn up the skills, but it is still my 1st time and I'm bound to make mistakes isn't it? tell me guys, if I'm wrong. Who doesn't screw up on their 1st time? (ok...maybe people like Thiam Sang, Jia Hui, Kishu and Kit Wai who are really smart enough to pick up everything in advance) other than that, people like me? no way! Seriously guys, I wish you were there to witness how terrible insulted and scolded me...you may say that I'm sensitive and I can't even stand such a small matter, wait till you're in my position and trust me, that fella will be out of the windscreen instantly...

So, I didn't utter a word at all but I kept apologising to him, it turned to vain. That shit face was not merely condemning or advising me on what to do but he gave me a-punch-right-in-the-face type of criticism knowing I am a fresh learner...I kept quiet the whole journey partly because I'm just too scared to go against him and I didn't wanna create any mess verbally. Until the second day of lesson, he kept on going until I was too nervous and the car broke down twice. That's the straw that broke the camel's back, I countered back at him, IN A NICE WAY...and his excuse? ~
'but I've taught you before and this is not the 1st time you drove already, you still make the same old stupid mistakes no matter how much I've told you, you people are always like that, when the instructor are pointing out ur mistakes and you people make a havoc out of it and said we're scolding you...'

And guess what he was doing that time? EATING HIS CHAR KUEY TEOW...

What the F*CK?! TO HELL WITH YOU I CAN LEARN WHEN YOU'RE OPENING YOUR SHIT FILLED MOUTH AND GIVING ME PRESSURE! I will not swear if nothing provokes me to this extent and I'm sorry blog buddies...

So the lesson went on and he cut of my conversation several times when I'm explaining my situation also IN A NICE WAY...hence, I was fed up and I zipped. So did he. At the end he actually apologised to me 'if he said anything wrong and he was sorry' which I doubt it was sincere by listening to his tone but I accepted it after all.

Told my parents about the incidents and I was quite surprised with their reactions XD I kinda expect they would say he's just a strict guy who who wants perfection, instead my mom told me that she did not seemed to like this fella when she met him earlier on. Great...at least they're standing by my side...Mom even taught me how to give him back if he attacks me again... XD haha...

But I still have another lesson with him (sighs~) and dad told me he would find another instructor for me just for the extra hours. I don't mind to have him throughout the course cause if I'm able to face these people, life would be easier for me next time but to accept their love in full, I agreed to change =D

Therefore the lesson is when you guys ever came across these kind of human, do not ever let your raging emotions get the better of you. Listen to what they say, calm yourself and later on, counter them back in a nice way (which is what the M'sians say 'give them back kao-kao lah') XD haha..about this aspect, I would say I did it, but I'm still in the midst of learning..and most of all, DEAL WITH IT as you never know that you will be working with these people for your whole life!

Phew! So done am I =D

Into reality of acceptence, ready am I?

Good day people! Gosh..i know guys..i'm so so so sorry for not posting anything for god knows how long...a couple of things happened...the not-so-nice ones...but...today..i'm back with...what else but WORDS XD

So, for as long as I'm gone, it has been a roller-coaster, no, waaAy more than the roller-coaster spin!!! my oh my...this is life people..this is life...

Ok...I know I'm rambling here, lets just get straight to the issues. So, not long ago, Wei Keat just went off to Canada to live his dreams~ in becoming a top-class Aircraft Engineer =D and we've been to his farewell gathering which was kinda...intense, somehow... you have to be in my position to know exactly how I felt at the very moment when time ticked away and it's almost dinner time which means we may not see each other again after that dinner...

The reason why I did not want to post about the gathering is that...I don't wanna be reminded of that day's event...well nothing much in particular for some of y'all, it may seemed like just an ordinary gathering and friends leaving blah blah blah...but that was the day where few of us indulged in the very last few moments together of what we called 'close friends' or better still 'life-time buddies' (ok don't get me wrong, no one is DYING here) =_=' but try thinking about it, 5 years, err...may be 4 years, yeah 4 long years of friendship and what I mean by friendship is the REAL friendship...which lasts for a lifetime...not worth talking about it?

GO-TO-HELL

For those who has the balls to think that way. Period.

Then there came separation. The moment when the lift closed its huge, cold, lifeless metallic door, our emotions sprang out like a cheetah preying on its prey...I mean although I controlled my emotions well and I didn't had a teary eye, that horrible feeling that churned and churned in you was truly unbearable.

Over the days, as I've really came to accept that separation is merely part and parcel of life, and what would I be if either one of my parents have answered Lord's calling? Could I be crying and whining forever? Could I stop the time right there or just be travelled back in time or I could make myself another parent again? Never will I...

And that is why the Chinese always said, 'there is no fate without separation'. How true.

So what's the big fuss about it? are you Gay or what?

GO-AND-F**K-YOURSELF. Period.

I certainly think emotionally attached to someone has nothing to do whether you're gay or not and (if you are, that's a whole new issue) but back to the point, Wei Keat and I and our 'gang' had been inseparable ever since we've known each other...I've learned to accept and whatever it is, we are just happy for him as we know that this fella had struggled through life not physically but psychologically (he's not mad people =_='')

And then another painful separation. A t the train pick up station. Well thankfully no one really burst out sobbing or else it would be inconsolable...I felt quite numb that day, maybe because I've been through so much other than this and probably because major part of us had been let go during the night after the farewell gathering. Wei Keat's expressions were almost intense and it was not his usual self. We can't blame him though, he's off to a whole new world, all by himself and brace the storms that are yet to come.

And they are gone: ay, ages long ago,
...fled away into the storm.
(-John Keats~ The Eve of St. Agnes)

And life goes on...without single break or freeze. Have I really let go? Have really accepted that separation is inseparable with life?

Have I?

Down in the flood of remembrance, I weep like a child for the past.
(D. H. Lawrence~ Piano)

Poesy within oneself

(Poesy of silence)

A wilting blossom,
A dying soul.

A gloomy day,
A candle-less life.

A raining afternoon,
A sobbing tale.

A starless night,
A void’s emptiness.

A song to sing,
A heart to be broken.

A mended heart, with broken pieces...

You will never know that separation can actually tear your heart into a million pieces. The pain will eventually find its way to the deepest darkness and implants itself till you can never get out of the clinging of that nasty being.

For 5 years now, it suddenly dawned on me, where once had long became then, where the air of sadness gushed in and the fall of loneliness kicked in...

(Once, then.)

Once again,
A mended heart is broken.
The air of remorse,
Gushing across my sanity,

The fall of loneliness.

With a somber tune,
I hummed a song.

RandoM Rushes...

'Heard melodies are sweet, but those unheard are sweeter'
~John Keats from Ode to a Grecian Urn

Talking about life now may seem a little bit too early. But trust me, life will get to you. Soon.

Hello people! Seriously, I have totally no idea on what to post about today. As mentioned before, words can fill your mind in a second but within the next, everything gone with the winds. Anyway, I had just randomly picked a line from Keats - my 'favorite' poet to just...err..you know, to spark some inspirations out of me..ha-ha... Just got back all my papers recently, failed Math, passed Bio but didn't do too well, PASSED LAW!!!!!! OMG!! this is the best that could ever happened to my entire college life!!! and got a B+ for Literature and guess what? I just couldn't believe that I would still be able to obtain the higest overall grade in class despite my terrible individual grades...haha at least it's something lar...although it's just like a few marks away from the ever-intelligent, English-power-house Clarissa...xD hahaha! but seriously she beat me flat in law whereby she had scored the higest in class beating the 'former best-scorer' Mei Xin aahhahah!! Nevertheless, I'm still glad that we actually passed law coz everyone was so terrified by this subject...

So...I guess thats for now and I'll be back with more photos next time when I blog...gosh..my eyes can barely stay open now...(yawns~~) so long and have a good night!

Behind the shadow of fear...

*Sigh~* I'm scared. I'm feeling real scared. What has become of me? I...I just...can't seem to shake off the deepest fears in me... Not that I'm scared that I will not wake up tomorrow, but, it's just...something...that I wasn't able to clear off eversince...Ahh...someone just please fill me with words...

There are time when fear creeps into you and slowly, it infects each and every corner of your heart and somehow, you'll be able to survive but what is behind it, it's just unbearable...when I see other people, living their lives like there's no tomorrow...I actually envied them...perhaps, it might be a mistake for me to be born into this dimension, perhaps, this is my punishment from my past life, perhaps, this is just what I deserve, perhaps...

I know I shouldn't have talked bout this in the 1st place as what faced by other people will not even be a fragment compared to mine. But, I really hope that you guys understand and don't judge me too hard for who I am...no worries guys, I'll be instantly ok when I et up tomrrow. I just gotta sleep it off and that's the best way for keeping me 'alive'...hahaha...

Deep down, I really wished to reach out for that something.

(Behind a shadow)

The rain,
Just like the sour tears of my shadow.
Once again,
A spell is cast on me,
My shadow,
The figure in the dark,
The invisible in the light,
Follows me a thousand miles.
Never seen heaven,
Never heard of the angels.
I see the rain,
I see the clouds,
I see not the gentle soul behind the shadow.
Weeping like a lost child,
Sorrow’s sadness, settles through,
Deep, deep in the shadow of the dark.

Behind it,
A bleeding butterfly.

Heart of the relieved, heart of the decieved

Great. I FAILED my Math. Isn't that the proudest thing that a Chinese guy can ever declare? Yeah. I guessed so. Many people had told me that oh c'mon! You're a chinese and Math is basically in your blood! And plus, you're a guy for God's sake! Yeah right.

I kinda expected it, but I still feel the pinch deep down. Never mind the trials, screw it. Easy to say. Hard to let go. Just a trial. Yeah, sooner or later it would be the real Edexcel exam. Funny huh people like me actually FAIL Math. I know everyone is saying oh please Choon Hui, Math is like the EASIEST thing you could possibly find in the world! Do more exercises...blah... I know that I've said this for the thousand times that I shouldn't compare, but... reality is all around us. No matter how hard you try to ignore the truth, the truth is, my Math still sucked. Like Hell.

Maybe Math is not my thing, I admit. Could it be a lie? An excuse to escape from all the injections of pain? Is that just an excuse to make me feel better? A big fat lie or a truth? What are lies and what can be considered as truth? Aren't we living on lies? what are the truths behind? We tell lies to make people feel better, we even tell lies to the children whereby we always ask them not to tell lies. What an irony.

Some people doesn't respond well to the 'after-effects' of lies. But I certainly do.

(A soul's prison)

Ah!
The guilty twist,
Churning my heart like a windmill gone wild!

The manipulated truth!
Stupid me! Foolish me!
Of how pathetically minded am I…

Sorry?
If only Lord forgives me…
I’ve summoned the demon to me,
I’ve awakened the devil from its grave,
I’ve spilled out the evil out of me…
Lead them to damnation!
Lead them to the pile of flaming flames!
Leave me alone!
Oh leave me alone!

A sinful tune I’ve just hummed
A blameless soul had I trapped,
Deep down the garden of thorns,
Deep down the chambers of untruthfulness…
Set him free!
Let him be!

It feels like being pursued by the angel of death,
As I can sense the momentary glare
from the viciousness of his somber eyes,
And haunt the nightmares of all nightmares

Can I keep this attic locked for eternity?
So that not a soul will venture?

That I shall wake in the arms of motherly warmth,
And sink into the bosom of truth.

Ah! Take me to your hands
And let the flow of pure water to wash away the filth
That long clotted the very stream of my soul…

I 'LOVE' exams...

I HATE EXAAAAAAAAAMMSS!!!!! ARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE F*#$%#%#@!!!!!

Ah...now I felt better. WAAAY better.

So sorry you guys, got to welcome you with all my 'pleasant' and 'fanciful' words...I majorly screwed most of my papers so far...especially LAW!!!!!!!! WHAT THE ... ?!! (ok..ok...deep breath...1...2...3...) Can't believe I screwed up, again. Despite all the exercises we did, it still came back to square 1... Clarissa and I were like oh shit, we're so f***ing dead...so so dead...some one shoot us please...
(imagining Mrs. Dharma pointing a bazooka at our face and fire, 'your results are PATHETIC!!! HEAR what I say? P-A-T-H-E-T-I-C!!! DON'T EVEN THINK OF BREATHING IN MY CLASS...KKAABOOMM...BOOOOFFFFF....)

There you go. A hell lot of pathetic crap happened. My Mechanics 1, uugghh... don't even mention about it. I don't think I could even get something higher that 10 marks... yeah... that's Choon Hui doing MATHS...(how terrible it sounds...m.a.t.h.s... =_= why can't they just name it, The Rule of Numerical Studies instead? No! Why in the first goddamn place this piece of sH*t existed)
my apologies again guys, no offense, but you DOknow

Choon Hui = hater of The Rule of Numerical Studies

Anyway...Not gonna have a long post or any poems for now coz' I still have loads to study and the next post I'll have a poem on LIES... big word eh? Stay tunned...

Finally...I'm back with words...haha

Yeeloow people!!! ha-ha...Haven't been updating my blog for quite some time. Yeah thanks to all the law tests that is starting to suck the joy out of it...gosh I just had one today and most of us basically stared blankly at the question paper for a good 10 minutes before we started scribbling some unrelated nonsense ha-ha...So... we did Keats today during our lit class and it was an interesting lesson as Ms. Grace wrote out the major themes of his poems and asked us to relate the poems to the themes which nearly drove Alex crazy as we spot the poems like no one Else's business, where else he was scratching his head trying to figure out which one haha! and they're not many poems left since most of them had been convenientlyspotted by us...heeheehee xD

Can't believe next Wednesday is already our trials and guess what? I haven't even touch on Maths which is by far the worst subject for me. Wonder how would I even maintain a passing grade for my Mechanics 1...ugghh...Mrs. Sharma, our Bio lecturer just said that the Aussies are so proud of people taking Maths until they are capable of saying that nothing is more important than Maths and with Maths, you need nothing more... =_=' one word, PATHETIC!!! but anyway, good for you guys like Wai Lun who has been taking Maths and God knows what other branches of Maths is he taking and he's going to Aussie soon, so you'll be on top of the world. Ha-ha!

I used to wish that time was a flowing stream of river.
Now, I wished for time as a stagnant pool of water. How ironic.

That drove me to come up with this latest poem of mine called, Let it be time, for it is time. xD
Oh by the way, I have already written 64 poems. =D and I'm so very glad. It may just be words, but at least I do have something out of the extraordinary =)

(Let it be time, for it is time)

Let me dissolve in time,
For it is too short a life.

Let me be grounded in a crystal ball,
For I will be in goodness’s memory forevermore.

Let me a sculpture,
For I can witness the aging of present to history.

Let me be an urn, buried in legend,
For old is gold.

Let me be a painting,
For a moment captured be forever framed.

Let me be written into poesy,
For words will be eternally remained.

Let me be one with You,
For You is where I begun in time.

Tagged by Ms. Angeline...

ALOHA people! now I cant believe I've actually asked someone to tag me...hahaha coz I think I kinda fancy this tag where you use the songs in the player to answer them and mainly because I have lots of MARIAH songs in my player (DUH...) XD so I asked for it..hehe...here it goes.

The Golden Rules:
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn't make sense.
4. With the answers, give your own comments on how they relate to the questions.
5 . Tag at least 5 people.

1. How are you feeling today?
-One love by BLUE
Feeling loved? =D

2. If someone says, “Is this okay?” You say?
-Greatest gift of all by Jim Brickman and Michelle Wright
If i were to receive anything as a present, I'll say this is definitely the greatest gift of all!

3. What do you like in a guy/girl?
-Cant fight the moonlight by LeAnn Rimes
A fighter, but a moonlight melody at heart (deep huh??) XD

4. Will you get far in life?
-God bless the broken road by Rascal Flats
How appropriate!! A journey of life that's determined by HIM...Lord bless me =)

5. What do you think about very often?
-It's like that by Mariah Carey
ehh...like that lor...hahaha

6. What is 2 + 2?
-All that I need by Boyzone
4 is not everything I need leh...haha

7. What's your best friend's theme song?
-Mine again by Mariah Carey
hmm....I doubt it coz it seems MC has something against him...muahaha

8. What is the story of your life?
-Anytime you need a friend by Mariah Carey!
My story will not be complete without my buddies =D

9. What is/was your high school like?
-Time to say goodbye by Sarah Brightman and Andrea Bocelli
I hate to goodbye to my high school life...thats how I would describe

10. What is your motto?
-The greatest love of all by Whitney Houston
Inspired by LOVE and guided by knowledge =)

11. What’s the best thing about your friends?
-Open arm by Mariah Carey
Their open arms of course =D

12. What do you think of the person you like?
-I'll never break your heart by Backstreet Boys
heehee...

13. What do you want to be when you grow up?
-Can't let go by Mariah Carey
I can't let go of MONEY!!! so I wanna be a TRILLIONAIR!!! hahahaha

14. What do you think of when you see the person you like?
-Butterfly kisses by Bob Carlisle
hmm....the kisses?! OMG... =_='

15. Describe your grandparents.
-One moment in time by Whitney Houston
I've lost both my grandfathers and my my grandmothers are living in this wonderful moment

16. How's your life going?
-Baby can I hold you by Boyzone
=_=' can I hold you back Mr. Time?

17. What is your biggest fear?
-Without you by Mariah Carey
Living without you mummy. =D

18. What will be played at your funeral?
-As long as you love me by Backstreet Boys
yeah...as long as you guys love me.. =)

19. What is your hobby/interest?
-Because we believe by Andrea Bocelli
=_=' can't think of anything...

20. Will you have a happy life?
-Flying without wings by Westlife
The song explains it =)

21. What do your friends really think of you?
-Let the music heal your soul by Bravo all stars
hmm...soothing comforter? XD

22. Do people secretly lust after you?
-I stay in love by Mariah Carey
I'll say STAY IN LOVE PEOPLE!

23. How can you make yourself happy?
-Bringing on the heartbreak by Mariah Carey
=_=' never know that'll make me happy...

24. Will you ever have children?
-Everyday I love you by Boyzone
mom says she wants a DOZEN! =_='

25. What song would you strip to?
-How do you want me to love you by 911
=_='

26. What does your mom think of you?
-I will remember you by Sarah McLachian
She'll remember me as a good son xD

27. What do you think of your parents?
-After tonight by Mariah Carey
not just tonight, they're forever great, day and night

28. What is your deep, dark secret?
-At the beginning OST of Anatasia
at the beginning I was...(not to be revealed) ;-P

29. What is your enemy's theme song?
-All that you want by Gary Barlow
All that it takes to accept me as your friend

30. What will you dance to at your wedding?
-That's the way it is by Celine Dion
Celine Dion?! haha

HAHA..that's about it...so I'll tag...
-WENG CHUNG
-CLARISSA
-JIAN FUNG
-KELVIN
-ALITHEA

Have fun guys! =D

A thousand words but a silent void...

Feelings. What a word. So much to say, so much to tell. Yet, it fails me.

My journey of life, certainly is a mountain of hills and valleys, a chapter of endless tales and a journey of roller-coaster ride.

At times, words just don't seemed to flow in our minds and feelings, yes, I mean feelings always got the better of you. I always ponder upon events that coincide my life and somehow, for certain reasons, I am unable to describe how I feel or who am I deep down in me, although this may sound like an 'ordinary emotional poet like KEATS' whom I never intended to be. Still, not a syllable I can say nor tell although at a certain point, I have been through so much that I felt I could write a book, after a while, gone are the thousand words, gone are the voices...Be it truth, be it lies, all burried in the deepest soil that no one can reach, and there comes a fountain of the untold and unheard.

(A thousand of a thousand)

A book with a thousand words,
Seemed like a never ending fountain,
That goes on forever-and ever-and ever.

My mind with a thousand emotions,
Feels like a sea of human faces,
Passing me by with questions unanswered.

The sky with a thousand stars,
Glint and shine like a goddess’ gem.
Decorated heaven with glows of the ancient guardian.

My spirit with a thousand sobs,
Nothing heals better than an erased memory,
That clings on to the core deep down in me.

The stream with a thousand glitter,
Turned into a river frozen with the untold,
Iced-up with the unheard.

tagged by Weng Chung...

OMG...i cant believe i'm doin this in the middle of 2 am...great..no thanks to weng chung...anyway...i just wanna tag...err...CLARISSA, ERIC and MS. ANGELONTHELINE =D...so guys...u're tagged!!!hahaha..and guess what, this is the 1st time being tagged and the 1st time i'm tagging other people...

01. What have you been doing recently?
lots of internet and i've been studyin for my trials...sobs...

02. Do you ever turn your cell phone off?
yup, at night when i'm asleep..infrared waves bad for us lar..haha

03. What happened at 10.00am today?
-was having my breakfast at 6 happiness restaurant-having dim sum =D

04. When did you last cry?
-no idea xD

05. Believe in fate/destiny?
-definitely!! read my poems and u'll know =D

06. What do you want in your life right now?
hmm, MONEY!!! haha well health, family members being together and A's for my exams =)

07. Do you carry an umbrella when it rains, or just put up your hood?
-umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh... =_='

08. What’s your favourite thing to have on your bed?
-my boaster =D

09. What bottom are you wearing now?
-NOTHING!!! 0.O''' hahaha shorts la...

10. What’s the nicest text in your inbox say?
-hmm some chinese text sent by Kin Yang the day before high school graduation

11. Do you tend to make a relationship complicated?
-never did, life shouldn't be complicated =D

12. Are you wearing anything you borrowed from someone?
-NO!!!

13. What was the last movie you caught?
-Band of Brothers on dvd...awsome movie!!

14. What are you proud of?
-myself i gueesed? hahaha, my height and my voice i guess???muahaha (perasan betul)

15. What does the oldest message in your inbox says?
-ai yor...i have messages dated back to 2005 la..haha it's bout a silly joke..haha

16. What was the last song you sang out loud?
-the american national anthem?! MUAHAHAHA not that i feel in love with the people...haha

17. Do you have any nicknames?
-not that i know....maybe choon choon called by Stefanie?? =.=' haha

18. What does your last received text message say?
-y u wanna know? heeheehee

19. What time did you go to bed last night?
-11.57 pm?

20. Are you currently happy?
-not really...hard to describe

21. Who gives you best advice?
-MOM!!!

22. Do you eat whipped cream straight from the can?
-i would love to do that =D but i do like to eat the cream 1st frm my favorite JUMBO PUFF bought frm KLCC..haha

23. Who did you talk on phone last night?
-MOM?

24. Is anything bugging you right now?
-yea...my trials and

25. What/who was the last thing/person to make you laugh?
-mom wacking dad! hahaha thats hilarious

26. Do you wear toe socks?
-what on earth are those???

27. Who was the last person you missed a call from?
-tak tau lar..haha

28. Have you ever had your heartbroken?
-definitely duh...

29. What annoys you most in a person?
-i hate fakers and those who are blind towards other people's feelings

30. Do you have a crush on anyone?
-yea...

31. Have you ever done cocaine?
-even i were to die also i wont do it

32. What is the colour of your room?
-white =_='''

33. Would you kill someone you hate for a billion dollar?
- why would i? i'm a BUDDHIST!!! =D no one can do bad in my blog since i put up such holy pic =)

34. Do you believe in the saying of : talk is cheap?
-NO! it costs u ur life if u say something wrong

35. Who was the last person to lie in your bed?
-my bro =.=

36. Who was the last person to hug you?
-mom =)

37. Did anyone see the last person you kissed?
-i never kissed anybody

38. Do you have a life?
-what?! what kind of question is this?!!

39. Have you ever think someone died, when they really didnt die?
- =_='

40. What is the reason behind your profile song?
-i just loved it and i wanna put that as my wedding theme song...hahaha

41. Who was the last person you saw in your dream?
-forgotten...

42. Last time you smiled?
-when answering question 40 =DD

43. Have you changed this year?
-hmm...i think so...physically and mentally

44. What are you listening right now?
-nothing

45. Are you talking to someone when you doing this?
-no...

46. Do you walk with your eyes open or closed?
-another f****ing question...haha

47. Is there a quote you live by?
-inspired by love and guided by knowledge

48. Do you want someone you cannot have?
-absolutely, that will be MARIAH CAREY!!! =D she's my ultimate fav singer...

49. Have you ever played an instrument?
-yes, a piano...and my only isntrument now to me is my voice =D

50. What was the worst idea you’ve had in this week?
-to not to study...

51. What are you doing last night at 11pm?
-half way through my M'sian Studies assignment...=_=' wat a 'fabulous' sub...

52. Are you happy with your love life right now?
-i'm not taken and i'm available ;-P

53. What song best describe your love life?
-i'm not in love lor...

54. Does the person know that you like him/her?
-not to be told...

55. Who always make you laugh?
-mom, friends...

56. Do you speak other language other than English?
-oh yes of course...mandarin, malay, hokkien, canto

57. Favourite website(s)?
-youtube and Yahoo...haha

58. What’s your middle name?
-Choon
59. What are you doing tomorrow?
-no idea, breakfast, then maybe will go to shop for a pair of new shoes and then back home, reading..

60. What do you think you are like?
-A HUMAN...
61. Who will you choose to die with?
-my soul...

62. Where have you been today?
-Jusco Wangsa Maju

63. What game do you play often?
-i seldom play games...UNO on msn i guess

64. Who are you missing right now?
-my old self...

65. If you have to choose between friend and love, who will you choose?
-friend

66. What are you doing right now?
- another question like that...i'm gonna swear =.=

67. Which primary school are you from?
-i'm frm 4 primary schools xD

68. Name 3 colours that you like?
-white, navy blue, black

69. What emotion you like to show?
-calm and steady

70. What is your life to you?
-everything, a period of time where i could live my desired dreams

71. If you have something troubling you, what will you do?
-sleep it off and most probably pen a poem..what else can i do?

72. Who did you last chat in msn today?
-Eric, Weng Chung, Kheng Hong

73. Who do you admire most?
-Mariah Carey and my MOM

74. Which month are you born in?
-April

75. How are you feeling right now?
-pathetically tired...

76. What is the time now?
-1.45 a.m

77. What kind of person do u think the one who tagged you is?
-funny, intelligent, unexpected

78.What colour did you use to dye hair?
-no dye plz...

79. Why are you doing this test?
-just to please sumone... =.=

80. What do you do when you’re moody?
-sleep it off as i say...a poem will help...listen to some Mariah Carey

81. At which age you wish to get married?
-whenever after i'm successful

82. Who is more important to you?
-mom and brother

83. If today is the last day of your life, what will you do?
-write the last poem and spent the last moments with my family.

84. Who is the person you trust the most?
-mom of course

85. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after a rain?
-yes i do. =)

86. If you have a dream come true, what would it be?
-seeing Mariah Carey face to face

87. What is your goal for this year?
- to get at at least 1 A for my trials...

88. Do you believe in eternity love?
-yes...but its hard to find nowadays...

89. What feeling do you love most?
-happiness and serenity

90. Do you really think its Global Warming now?
-duh...

91.What feeling do you hate the most?
-fright and disappointment and embarrassment

92. Do you cherish every single friendship of yours?
-yes...for always

93. Do you believe in God?
-i believe in Gods and Buddha

94. Who cares for you most?
-mom =D

95. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
-being able to take care of bro and mom...for now, getting into a good U and scoring grades

96. What will you bring when you fight?
- i dont fight...

97. What have you done regretted doing in your whole life?
-bullying Chu Wen, my primary 4 classmate, and i just loose contact with her...

98. What would you feel if no one no longer cares for you?
-i'll accept it as my fate...

99. What if your boyfriend/girlfriend two-timed you?
-wtf...

100. HOW DO U FEEL NOW?
-you tell me... =_='''

Of Brothers and Bonds

Have you ever wonder how life would be like when we are still at war in this very second? Or for the guys, have you ever thought of how does it feel if you were to become a soldier and the country lies in the hands of yours? I did.

I was overwhelmed by feelings after watching 'Band of Brothers' by Steven Spielberg and Tom Hanks and once again, I was sharing the same minds of the 'brothers' in that movie as if I was there, witnessing the whole moment all these while.
'Beyond the wounded and killed, every men in Bastogne suffered. Men unhit by shrapnel or bullets were nevertheless casualties.'
Stephen E. Ambrose

That quotation explains my feelings at the very moment. I'm certain that this was also felt by all the ex-soldiers who had helplessly watched and seen their pals got hit in the midst of a fiery war.
And so... the story goes on. And I am really thankful to Lord that I was not born into the century of agony and death, instead, I was sent to a time where I'm able to sit in front of my computer comfortably with the air conditioner on. In fact, ever since I watched 'Pearl Harbor' starring Josh Hartnett and 'Empire of the sun' starring Christian Bale, I started to fancy movies with the settings of the post-1900 and movies regarding the Second World War. Not because of the violence inflicted of course, but the values hailed from these kind of movies. The bondage of 'war-buddies' and brotherhood, which has almost, always, gives a sense of awe to me. Well of course I'm not just referring to the American soldiers in particular, but to all soldiers and those true warriors out there who had fought for their countries and been through the 'hell on earth',

I salute you with my deepest respect. And here I dedicate a beautiful medley by Mariah Carey. It's actually a cross-over between 2 songs called Never too far and Hero. Listen to the song and here are the lyrics. Enjoy and be one with the song =D



You're with me
Till the bitter end
What we had transcends
This experience
Too painful to
Talk about
So I'll hold it in
Til my heart can mend
And be brave enough to love again
A place in time
Still belongs to us
Stays preserved in my mind
In the memories there is solace
Oh,
Never too far away
I won't let time erase
One bit of yesterday
Cause I have learned that
Nobody can take your place
Though we can never be
I'll keep you close to me always remember
Love

When you feel like hope is gone,
Look inside you and be strong,
And you'll finally see the truth,
that a hero lies in you.
Lord knows, dreams are hard to follow
But don't let anyone, tear them away.
Hold on, there will be tomorrow.
In time, you'll find the way
And then a hero comes along, with the strength to carry on,
And you cast your fears aside, and you know you can survive.
So when you feel like hope is gone,
Look inside you and be strong,
And you'll finally see the truth, that a hero lies in you.
That a hero lies in you
Nobody can take your place
You're never too far

Never too far away, the battle, the tears, the blood, the joy, the victory will always lie deep within a warrior's book of life, and no matter what, he and the rest of the 'brothers' will always stay connected in each other's heart where a true hero lies within. ;-)

God bless.

To nature's path, to human's soul

As I've studied in literature, John Keats, whom I really wished to dig him up of his grave and swear the brains out of him for making our life miserable with the questioning of his so called 'role of a poet' He's no doubt famous for his odes and more importantly, one of the significant characteristics of his poems are often associated with imaginations and the natural world. Though dreadful and indecisive about the feelings and emotions that are attached to him and most of the time, he's sort of in the state of 'intoxication', somehow, I do find what he said is what we, humans have begin to lost touch of. That is to be one with nature. Although it may not be such an important factor that influences our daily lives, but look at it from this perspective, once we die, we are buried, we decay, we rot and our parts are digested by the fungi and microorganisms, in the end, we will return to earth, our soul is permanent, but our bodily shell will soon returned to where it belonged.

Well I guess you kinda know what I'm gonna do next..hahaha...YES! a poem! haha!! alright, I actually composed this in the LRT as I splendidly forgotten to bring along my mp3 during a loooooog journey and it was after a rain that sparked the writing soul in me...muahaha...it's basically a piece that shows the sounds and senses of mother nature that affects the persona and how nature brings him closer to himself and the fountain within him.

(To nature’s path, to human’s soul)

A rainbow always comes after a pour,
And sunshine comes after a gloom.
When I looked into the woods,
And breathe a breath of earth-scented nature…
How it sooths vengeance soul, my fiery nerves.
The mist-veiled hills and mountains,
Became the altar of the whispering guardian.
The river carries the souls of the jagged stones
And mighty pebbles,
Down to a stream of little voices…
I looked at heaven again,
The rainbow banished,
The sun a giant ball of warmth,
Melting the winter barrier of the inhabitants,
Who are yet to be one with nature.

A trip to a town of nature

Good day! Good times always passed like a bullet train and yes, I had an awesome weekend with the children and volunteers of the Special Needs Learning Centre (SNLC) of Bukit Nanas which is where my brother is having his schooling. A trip was organized by the centre to Sg. Klah’s hot spring resort which is situated in the FELDA residence. By god, it was really a get-away from the hustle and bustle of city life! Not to mention the hot spring and the greens were just mesmerizing, even the resort area was a paradise! Guys, you people should seriously consider to make a trip there and I’m sure you will never forget.

It took us about 1 and a half hour drive to Sungkai exit at the highway and about 35 minutes drive towards the hot spring resort. I’m seriously thankful that I made it for the trip as I thought it was just another boring ‘rural trip’ and boy I was wrong! We just had so much fun there, everyone basically enjoyed themselves to the max and I was glad that the children did had fun too =D so for the first day, some of them reached there way earlier than us so they proceeded to the hot spring first. We met the group at the cafeteria and after lunch we went to the lobby to check in and I was kinda shocked to fin that the rooms were decently kept with simplicity and the best thing is the room was spacious! It can even fit 2 king size beds in the room with lots of space left. Although it was not as luxurious as those in the cities, but this is the whole purpose of it! Simplicity in the town of nature. Ha-ha.

We spent most of our late afternoon walking around the whole area from the palm estate to the spot of the hot spring then the rest of the evening was free and easy whereby me and my brother with a couple of families went to the hot spring therapeutic spot with individual pools and a stream of spring water running across the lane of rocks for foot reflexology. The temperature of the spring can reach till 50 degrees which we basically jumped like ants on a hot pan when we immersed our legs in the pools and especially walking on stones with hot water really made all of us went jumping like monkeys! XD there were various pools with different temperatures and all one has to do was just to soak your legs or immerse yourself into the pool of steaming spring water. It was really crazy at first since the water was so freaking hot, but surprisingly after awhile, you will actually get used to the temperature. We then went to the cold spot where an artificial waterfall lied and it’s actually a huge pool like those in Sunway Lagoon. It was really hilarious where the children will be sitting on us and we had a ‘pool fight’ and we men actually fought against each other. Hahaha! It was fun to see us drowning and defeating each other. Haha… then, it’s time for the hot pool where the water was even warmer than before. You can basically feel the scorching heat of the water on your skin especially when you’re topless =_=’ yeah… I was forced to strip…=.=’’’ and by the time when your lower body touched the water…my goodness. It feels like a zillion years…(you get what I mean especially for the guys =_=’…)

After dinner at the coffeehouse, we danced and sang all night long with the children. It was just fun all the way. Everyone was shy at first then all the funny dance moves started to kick in we were laughing our lungs out at some of the children and parents’ dances.

We went soccer with the children the next day in the morning after breakfast. It was another crazy moment. All the parents and siblings started screaming and yelling when the ball came to them or they’ll be yelling ‘KICK TO ME! KICK TO ME!!!’ hahaha…I actually played barefooted until I had my front toe injured =_=’ no big deal. Just a little blood here and there and that’s about it. XD but I still managed to pass the ball to them for our very first goal hahaha! Later on, we went for the egg boiling activity which was kinda weird to see eggs being ‘boiled’ in the pool of water. Can you imagine how hot the water was that only 8 minutes is required to have a full-boiled egg. See photos below :p

Went to pool again and had lunch before we checked out. It was really a journey worth the remembrance. Not only we got to experience all the interesting stuff but going on a trip with these kind of special kids made the trip even more meaningful than ever. =D definitely looking for another trip like that in future.

A scenic view of Sg. Klah, Felda.
A walk in the palm tree estate.
Therapeutic spot.
That’s my brother with his forced grin. (It was really hot!) =D
The coffeehouse.
Party through the night! XD
That is my brother and one of his teachers, Melanie. The guy with striped-T is one of the French volunteers, Frederick.
Mom with Ruben. =)
The resort through my lenses. Not bad huh my photographing skills. :p
The resort’s pathway.
Ann, Seng Kiat, Mrs. Kerk and Pierre at the breakfast table.
Brother, Mom and dad.
That guy covering his nose at the right is me =_=’
Me, brother, Shawn, Pierre.
Eggs in the pool! My dad's horrible photographing skills which captured my pathetically horrible grin =_='

A game of Tennis

Good day guys! I've decided not to post any poems today although originally I intended to do so and one friend of mine actually said 'Don't just post bout your poems lar...very boring you know...post something about your life mar...' =.=' yup... this was what he said..haha...

Anyway, it was quite an interesting day today. A buddy of mine and I went for tennis at YMCA and it was our first time having this game together as neither of us too had any skills..hahaha =P it was drizzling by the time we started off...and Bloody me, I should have brought a cap along as I have to play under the Bloody rain for a good 20 minutes =_='' but thankfully it was not that heavy and I seriously hope that I'll not fall sick coz I still have an outing tomorrow...back to the tennis court...yup...so there you go, the two of us, tennis balls 'flying' everywhere and I can proudly say that the balls too 'flew' out of court as well...hahaha...well you can't blame us right, after all these years of 'inexperience'...haha but somehow we managed to survived through =D it seemed like a rough start but gradually when we're more familiar and got used to the whole game, only then things turned better as there was less balls that flew out the court, BUT the amount of running here and there in the court had not been lesser..haha..well it's kinda hard to tell who is the better one but still I think Kit Wai can be accounted for it...i think his hitting skills and the way he grip and grab the racket was waaay better than mine as I still have the problem of gripping it like a badminton racket...so, way to go buddy!! haha...guessed he watched a lot of tennis tournaments =p as I said at least we made it through...was tiring though but Kit Wai was already half dead by then..muahahaha...Went back to college to change up, had a bottle of H2O and a slice of bread to prevent a 'stomach breakdown' (got such theory meh?) hahaha...and oh yes, I think we sweat more than we drank...haha..so you can imagine how drenched we were and how smart were we to wear a white top which he regarded as 'so sexy' when it drenched through our spine...hahaha so I din really dare to walk straight along the way, (you got the reason why... XD )

Therefore, Choon Hui + Kit Wai = possible DISASTER+plenty of groans =D hahahahaha!!!

It was nice game and good start after all =) at least we got to run around and we did a few cool shots and it was quite coordinated, surprisingly :-) in fact, no doubt that both of us had the strength but definitely not the skills...haha..so we need more practise indeed and more youtube I guess? haha! =D

Trapped within Ourselves...

Hey guys! Good evening! (The fact is I’m posting at night) duh! Ha-ha. Alright once again the poet’s instinct (ahem!!! Clears throat…) =P strikes me after an evening nap muahaha!. Anyway I’m in a midst of composing yet another poem; unfortunately it’s still under construction ha-ha. Will be up soon in no time =)

Sometimes, we often let our minds and feelings get the better of us. Try asking yourself how it feels when at times you just can’t seem to let out your feelings and it’s not that you don’t want to but you just can’t. Enough said. And I’m sure all of us here had been trapped before. Mentally, spiritually. When some circumstances forced us to be who we hated to be or forced us to suppress the feelings that makes our inside world goes round and round. Now this poem is closely linked to the dilemma and confusions faced by the persona and he eventually accepts them as these are part and parcel of life. it's called Trapped within emotions.


Trapped within emotions

Just like the devil and angel by my sides,
I am torn by feelings,
Confusions.
Didn’t know how to let them out
Didn’t know how to get by them;
I am trapped in my own soul,
Not being able to break free

I am confused,
So confused…

Between heaven and hell
I’m stranded on this unworthy air
Wondering around
Like a spirit
That just wouldn’t cross over
That belongs to neither here nor there

Again and again,
Happiness filled the void;
Again and again,
Disappointment shut my door tight…

Where do I belong?
Where shall I venture?
It doesn’t matter now,
Because it’s just part of life
That will cling to me for so long my breath is heard